Authors Series: Guest Post by Lynne Curry

Lynne_NEW_photo.jpg

Dr Lynne Curry, author of “Beating the Workplace Bully” and “Solutions”

I’ve written about being bullied as a schoolgirl,  but not yet about my skirmishes with workplace bullies. At my age, you’d think (at least I thought) I’d be teaching my kids how to stand up to classroom and playground bullies, not fending off my own. The sad reality, however, is that whether 9 or 90, man or woman, nobody’s immune to bullying. Albeit not a common topic, the numbers are staggering: Dr Curry quotes from a 2014 survey in the United States that notes 65.7 million working Americans experience or witness abusive and bullying conduct at the workplace.

Coming out of my most recent episode with a corporate sociopath, I knew I had two choices: to remain passive (empowering the bully); or to gain subject knowledge and create more awareness on the topic (empowering myself, and others in a similar situation). I chose the latter.

To begin, I needed a good book to dig into the 5W1H of it all. This is how I came to know Dr Lynne Curry, author of Beating the Workplace Bully and President of The Growth Company, Inc., a management consulting, training, human resources and organizational strategy firm. In a book that’s peppered with interesting real-life case studies and supplemented by helpful exercises, Dr Curry describes the characteristics, behaviors and vulnerabilities of seven workplace bully types: the Angry Aggressive Jerk, the Scorched Earth Fighter, the Silent Grenade, the Shape-Shifter, the Narcissist Manipulator, the Character Assassin, and the Wounded Rhino. And regardless of whether bullies are a product of nature or nurture, she stresses how bullies rarely ever stop bullying—instead, they zero in on other targets.

After I left her a book review, Dr Curry and I connected on Twitter and exchanged several emails. Though bullying is a topic close to my heart, I wanted to blog about it in a context larger than my own experiences. So I asked Dr Curry if she’d consider contributing a Guest Post, and she graciously obliged.

I hope you find Dr Curry’s personal story inspiring, as you certainly will with her books.


It’s For You That I Write and Why I Wrote a Book for You on Bullies

Like many, I grew up in a “messy” family and didn’t have anyone I could talk to—not about “those” things.  But then I discovered writing, and magic happened. By transferring the thoughts I couldn’t voice to my family to paper, and re-reading them each day, I breathed more freely. This was because the truth, as I knew it, was out there for all to see.

With writing, I learned to condense a world of experiences into a five- to thirty-line poem or short story, which friends soon became interested to read. And I found that the more honest I let myself be on paper, the more they enjoyed my poems and stories.

I dropped out of high school, and instead of sending college applications, I wrote a play and submitted it to several colleges. One of them responded, and invited me to meet them. They said my play had touched their hearts, and offered me a full-tuition scholarship.

After college, I tried to support myself by writing, but soon decided the starving artist life didn’t work for me. So I took jobs that paid a living wage, as a teacher, a counselor and finally as the owner of a consulting company. However, I still loved writing, so I kept a journal, in which I penned the challenges I faced at work. Writing about various characters in my workplace such as Snarky Stan, Ranting Patricia and Pushy Paula, I realized how it helped me put situations in perspective.

Then, one day, I submitted to the local newspaper three short pieces containing how-to advice for navigating workplace problems. They got published, and I was soon invited to write a weekly column for them. Two months later, the newspaper editor called, saying, “You have fan mail here,” and I picked up from them a large envelope containing 34 letters. These were from readers who asked questions such as, “How do I handle the creep who puts his hands all over me at the staff party?” and “My boss is MIA and my coworker shoves his work off on me, and I don’t want to let our customers down; what do I do?” That started a “Dear Abby of the Workplace” column, which is now in its third decade.

I kept writing, finding that it helped me make sense of things and decide on my next course of action. Even at times when I didn’t fully understand what I was feeling, I found that if I wrote down my most difficult experiences and then re-read them next day, I would view my experience with fresh eyes. Writing about what I did/didn’t do or should’ve/shouldn’t have done taught me a great deal more than if I’d just voiced thoughts silently inside my own head.

Eventually, I compiled the best of two decades’ worth of articles into a book called Solutions, which sold 10,000 copies. This led to many emails from readers who shared how they tried what I’d suggested and it worked, or that my book helped them take a step back and realize how they’d given their power away, but that they were now going to take it back.

"Solutions" by Dr Lynn Curry"Beating the Workplace Bully" by Dr Lynne Curry

Fast forward to why I wrote Beating the Workplace Bully: I was a victim, being married to a bully husband, and also working with bullies. One day, I started to write about the bullies I’d encountered, the mistakes I’d made, and the traps into which I’d fallen. Others targeted by bullies came to me for coaching, wondering how they magnetized bullies. With my help and advice, they learned how to stand up to the bullies in their lives, how to turn tables on bullies, and how to take bullies out.

Ultimately, I hope to inspire positive change in myself and in the world: maybe you’ll read what I’ve written and gain an insight, an emotional connection, or simply the feeling that someone else understands. Maybe your life will change, and you’ll then change the lives of those around you.

—Dr Lynne Curry


You can find here free excerpts of Beating the Workplace Bully and Solutions. Dr Lynne Curry blogs at www.bullywhisperer.com™ and www.workplacecoachblog.com.

Thank you, Lynne, for sharing!

Advertisements

#Read about Guest #Author Rachel Tey

Pyjamas or Pajamas? My guest post on Chris the Story Reading Ape’s blog! 🙂

Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog

Rachel Tey
Hi! I’m Rachel Tey. I work as a full-time editor of research publications at a local university. I am also: a book fiend; English history nut (particularly the middle ages); dog lover; and
Francophile. I live in Singapore with my husband, 8-year-old son, 3-year-old daughter, and an imaginary dog called Barky.

Here’s the story of how Tea in Pajamas came to be.

Tea in Pajamas came to mind in 2012, the year I made the conscious decision to recover from an eating disorder that plagued me in between my two pregnancies. I wanted to present a light-hearted action adventure novel for children aged 8 years and up (and adults young at heart), which was an allegorical depiction of my journey of recovery.

After suggesting the idea of writing this book to my husband over our Valentine’s Day lunch, he agreed to be the book illustrator. I then scribbled down…

View original post 763 more words

Authors Series: Guest Post by Andy Mulberry

About 1 and a half years ago, I did a Q&A with Andy Mulberry, fellow middle-grade author who blogs on the wacky Something Smells Fishy Here! She’s just released her third book in her Skycastle books series, with the fourth fast on its way. Fearless and adventure-loving readers are in for a real treat!

Today, I’m thrilled and honored to have Andy on my little space again. Ever wondered what an author gets up to when she isn’t busy writing stories? Andy, for one, loves taking roadtrips. In this Guest Post, she takes us on her recent jaunt to Southern California. Thank you, Andy, for sharing!


Thank you for having me, Rachel! Grab a cup of tea and put on your jammies, I’ll take you on a journey to, not Belzerac, but to Southern California, by way of snapshots taken with my trusted smartphone. ‘Cause if I’m not writing or reading or taking a nap, I like taking roadtrips along the coast and up to the mountains.

laguna b

Laguna Beach, California

laguna beach tower

Laguna Beach, California

These are snapshots from Laguna Beach, California. A quaint and eclectic town, Laguna Beach is an active artist community with countless art galleries. I like to come here for fish tacos and to watch the surfers do their thing—but even better are the early mornings when the beach is deserted except for the seagulls that try to steal your breakfast croissant.

gull

Those darn seagulls! Always hungry.

I took the below shot while driving to Idyllwild, which is nestled in the San Jacinto mountains. I come here for the tall pines, the cedars and the awesome hiking trails. No seagulls here, but beware the black bears that probably would want you for breakfast, not just your croissant. (Full disclosure: I’ve yet to see a bear during hiking; I’m starting to believe they’re just a myth.)

idyllwild

On my way to Idyllwild, California

runyoncanyon

View from Runyon Canyon Hiking Trail, Los Angeles, California

While we’re in the midst of winter, I regret to inform that it is currently 67F and sunny here. For someone like me who loves clouds, autumn rain and blustery winds, living in Southern California can be tough indeed. And if you’re ever around, let me know and I’ll buy you a cup of tea 🙂

In the meantime, you can connect with me on Twitter, Goodreads or my blog.

Andy Mulberry writes middle-grade fiction and lives in Southern California with her scowling teenager, a chubby blue cat-beast, an imaginary dog and one leaky roof. Her latest release, the third in a middle-grade series aimed at reluctant readers (boys!), is out now. Ask her for free review copies!

Skycastle Book 3 Cover